“Emotion is simply energy in motion. It is energy moving through your nervous system, but out of habit we learn to try and control it. The mind notices it and immediately wants to label it, based on past experiences. The energy moves and the mind says “Oh no, here comes the sadness/anger/depression again.” Then, after labelling it, we try to control it. The second thing the mind does is attribute a cause to it. “Now I am angry, and it’s all your fault!” Not only have we tried to control the movement of energy at this point, but also we are off chasing a story about what caused it in the first place. Simply relax and see if you can let the energy move without a label on it. Just let it be there. You may find that what at first appeared to be anger is something other.” Chit Happens by Nariain Ishaya.
When life gets you down, when you’ve had a bad day and feel moody or downright sad, what do you do about it? Do you act angry or sad towards everyone you interact with? Do you allow your mood to take over and affect you? How do you behave towards others? Do you make sure everyone is as miserable as you?
I call this spraying. It’s when you down take ownership of your emotions but instead you try to offload them to everyone else. It makes you feel better, but in the process you’ve made everyone else feel bad.
Blame, anger, resentment and hatred lock you in a cycle of victimhood that negates any opportunity for growth. Own your emotions. Taking personal responsibility for your emotions is the first step in being accountable for your actions. If you feel justified in behaving badly because you’ve had a bad day you’ll feel justified in hitting out, literally or metaphorically, to whoever is unfortunate enough to be close.
If you can be responsible for your actions you can make it through almost any relationship upheaval. It reduces the blame game, right fighting attitude that holds everyone else responsible for the problems besides yourself.
Being accountable and taking responsibility is empowering. It ensures that you have a strong sense of self worth and self esteem regardless of what happens in life. You can own your part and move on. You are only accountable to you so you no longer need the approval of others. Your own moral compass is the most important and not other people’s.
Emotional baggage, distorted subconscious beliefs from unresolved trauma will come up to be healed every now and then. Left long enough, emotional wounds are transferred from the energy body into in the cells and tissues of the physical body.
No one is immune. Everyone has emotions that need to be healed. Healing cannot occur unless you allow your stuff to rise to the surface to be looked at. We are all in a process of shedding old outmoded emotions, trapped, unresolved traumas and hurts. These old emotions need to come up into conscious awareness to be released.
Other people can act as a mirror (displaying your shadow, your rejected or suppressed aspect) or as a catalyst to bring up unresolved emotions. In order to release an emotion means working with the unpleasant, uncomfortable, unattractive shadow aspects of your being and emotions as they arise.
What is important is not necessarily to investigate and analyse your emotions. What matters is nonjudgmental release of the essence of the emotion (worry, fear, sadness etc) stored within your body – often in the head or stomach. Observe the emotion as energy. If you can treat the raw emotion without labeling it this will allow the fear to pass. It takes 90 seconds for an emotion to pass through the system if you don’t attach and intensify the energy. Acknowledge the emotion and let it pass.
How to Release Emotion
Mental stress manifests in the body first as physical stress, aches and pains. It isn’t as easy to release mental stress as it is to release physical stress. Releasing stress regularly means it isn’t left to become enmeshed and gradually worsen until it becomes dis ease. Allowing sadness to overtake you is counter-productive. Wallowing is a self-centred, self-indulgence and does not serve yourself or anyone around you. If you are miserable everyone around you will feel miserable also. Try to –
– Share your feelings with a trusted friend. Own it. Use “I” messages. “I feel…when…” Express how you feel and you’ll be surprised how quickly your emotions shift and the burden is lifted.
– Take the label off. Emotion is simply energy in motion. It is energy moving through your nervous system. Allow the emotion to pass through your system and out without the mind attaching a label to it and analyzing it. Simply relax and see if you can let the energy move without a label on it. Just let it be there. You may find that what at first appeared to be anger is something other.
– Own your emotions. Do not seek a scapegoat to blame. You are responsible for your own behavior. No one else.
– Pull yourself out. Hop or dance around, pull silly faces, laugh and see the lighter side of the situation.
– Get active. Exercise is a great way to process and move stuck energy and help get your energy flowing.
– Smile to trick the brain into thinking you are happy to send neurological happy signals.
– If you feel down your breath will be shallow and your upper body hunched over. If you feel disturbed or angry your breath will be irregular. Take a few deep cleansing breaths, put a smile on your face (even if its fake it will still trick your brain), straighten your spine and roll your shoulders back to open your chest and release endorphines. Feel the difference.
– Raise your vibration. Do something that gives you joy. Find joy in the simple pleasures. Go outside and take a walk, sit in the sun, cuddle an animal or embrace a trusted friend and drink plenty of water.
– Drop down into the heart. Offer your gratitude for even the simplest pleasures. Extend loving kindness towards all, including yourself.
– Find a level of detachment to other people’s stories and dramas. Seek to be an empathic listener without fueling their fire or taking their stuff on board as your own.
– Find a great energy healer! Even healers need healers! You don’t have to do this alone. Energy work will assist you in facing any uncomfortable feelings and support you in your process. Energy work releases any blocked energy ready to be released.
Own your emotions! Transformation is only possible if you have the courage to face your inner demons and allow the feelings and emotions to come out. Give yourself permission to allow and accept the good, the bad and the ugly within yourself.
With less emotional baggage means you have no fuel. You will no longer be reactive and triggered when you encounter challenging external events or people. You will stay grounded and centered rather than being buffeted by externals. You will be able to hold within your vibration and find those who match that vibration.
Art by Joey Cortez
Article by: Debra Reeves
Facebook: Tune In with Debra Reeves